Brevity

I’ve been putting this off. Like all things that have the potential to get out of control, I’ve procrastinated to the point of inaction. When one starts a blog one should make the first entry about, “who am I?” and what do I plan to write about and why the hell should anyone care? I hate writing these things because there is always a huge story and far more details within every nuance that makes up who you are. But I will give brevity a one-time shot:

I’m just a thirtysomething* mother of two – closer to 40 than 30. I was married and now I am not and this has not been a bad thing. I’ve been through all the phases of Eat, Pray, Love without having to take a year off and travel to Italy, India, and Indonesia. I can do Italy, India and Indonesia inside my imagination. You’re bound to hear a lot about my marriage indirectly. What you will not ever hear is me bitch about my ex. He’s a fine man and a good father. He just wasn’t for me and it took all the strength I had to walk away and live my life.

In no particular order I also adore the following things... I mention these only because you are bound to hear about them a lot.

My bike:

Or shall I say bikes. I started cycling just over a year ago and it very quickly became a part of my identity. I started because a friend at work was into it and I loved how he talked about how he felt on his bike. I wanted to know what that felt like. I bought one bike as a birthday present to myself in April 08 and by August 08 I was craving (and gave into purchasing) a more expensive upgrade. It turns out that, for a nearly 40 year old chick who’s only been cycling for just over a year, I’m not half bad. OK, I am better than not half bad.... but I can be better yet.

Road cycling addiction led to an experiment in mountain biking. I thought I was kamikaze enough to hit those trails and be just as talented as I am on the road. Not so, buttercup. In fact, I quite suck at sharp turns and roots. But I am learning and every time I go out I get better.

And if I could, I would go out right now and buy one of those single speed commuter bikes... but alas it is not in the cards for now.

I write:

My life started onto the path I am presently taking when I started writing my first novel about 4 years ago in September. Writing taught me how to get by on 4 hours sleep, how to be addicted to words, and how to drink lots of coffee (something I never did my whole life until I started to write). I can’t explain what writing did for me at that time. It sustained me. It brought me back to life. My first novel got me into a mentorship and it got me a high level Provincial writing grant. It was viewed by 3 agents in full, by two in part, and by two publishers, all of which ultimately turned it down.** It is a tough world out there. I’ve since written a second novel which still needs a lot of work. I need to write more and I have ideas burning in me all the time. Hence the blog.

Other miscellaneous athletics, none of which I like nearly as much as cycling:

I started as a runner. I can be moderately fast but cycling has killed a lot of my speed (big muscular thighs are hard to drag across pavement). Running and cycling got me into triathlon and I joined a Triathlon club last fall. In triathlon, I am kick-ass at the cycling part and am decidedly mediocre at the other two sports. As for swimming, I am a good swimmer; I am just not very fast. Otherwise, I will try pretty much anything. Next on the list: a 200 km bike ride this weekend, a 6 hour adventure race, and a full marathon. The list of goals never ends.

My children:

At the time of this writing my children are Emma (age 8) and Nolan (age 5.5). While I am not a mother who lives vicariously through and derives her entire identity from the activities and goings-on of my children, they are the centre of my world. I'm good at motherly things like teaching them stuff and encouraging independance. I am not very good at standing around the kitchen and making them food at their beck and call. They will become who they are destined to become. They will not try to turn them into mini versions me. Believe me, one of me is more than enough in this world.

My friends:

I have lots of them and I know more people that I ever thought. Facebook taught me this. I used to think I knew no one and had few friends. Some of my friends have amazing stories to tell in their own right. I have learnt in the last few years that opening up a little of yourself goes a long way to bringing you closer to others.

I write for me. I talk about what is on my mind at the moment and if it happens to agree with what is on your mind then you are guaranteed to like. If not, then skip, and maybe you’ll like the next one. Sometimes I’ll complain, sometimes I’ll be excited, sometimes I’ll be sarcastic, and sometimes I’ll be sad. I write from a really deep place and I’m bound to be overly emotional and too revealing. I’m far too honest for my own good and my life has been more than a little dramatic in recent years (some of that you may hear about but most of it you will not). I can’t tell you where I’m going to start or where I am going to end up. But come along and I’ll show you where I am at.***

*running the word together and the italics is not a typo. I watched that TV show religiously when I was in my teens and early twenties (which probably suggests that I have always been an older soul than my chronological age) but it seem few people really remember it. I’ve tried to write things in other domains where I’ve used that phrase with the word run together and I always get edited out. I guess it no longer counts as pop culture.

**technically, the second publisher hasn’t turned down the novel. I’ve just never heard from them. They requested it three years ago approximately, told me it was on a “shortlist” and every time I checked back they said it still hadn’t been read by their editorial board. The last email I sent checking in never received a reply. I’ve gotten tired of waiting and I’ve stopped checking in. But this is how publishers work. You are at the beck and call of their whims and whatever they think they can sell. I really should check in again, though.

***I'm still figuring the technical details of blogging out. I don't know how to place pictures in the right spot or how create clever headings or backgrounds. I'll get there. Be patient with me.